Why Do People Hate Me? 3 Reasons and what YOU can do about it!

Why do people hate me

Why do people hate me? If this is a question you’ve been asking yourself you probably deal with issues such as:

– Nobody calls me

– Nobody gives me compliments

– Only my family members show interest for me

– Only my mom loves me

– When I walk out of a room, everyone’s mood suddenly changes

– People don’t talk to me

– People ignore me

This article will provide you an answer to your question “Why do people hate me?”

1. You are too nice

Damn it! There is so much stuff to look at. Don´t stand close to anyone, don´t look angry, talk more, have a nice small talk, always say hi to people you know, don´t ask too personal questions, don´t disagree on delicate topics, bla bla bla. Do you really think people care a shit?

Couple of years ago I went to a workshop for applied psychology and hypnosis. Our trainer wanted to demonstrate some new coaching technique and asked, whoever has some kind of problem should please come to the stage. For demonstration purposes, he would do the coaching session with the person in front of us. A guy named Danny came on stage. It turned out, he hadn´t had any friends except his girlfriend. He was a lonely guy, but seemed to be nice. After the seminar, a friend of mine named Alex and I asked Danny to eat out with us so he could socialize and maybe make some new friends. He was a really nice guy. Unfortunately he was trying to be too nice to us all the time. He didn´t show his real face but rather agreed on everything we said. The conversation turned out to be boring as he lacked to have an own opinion.  No, we didn´t hate him for this behavior. The conclusion from this is just that humans mostly prefer polarizing people, rather than someone who agrees to everything and doesn´t provide any stimulus. People just love to be challenged in a certain way.

But why do people hate me? Am I really too nice? Don´t get me wrong. There is nothing bad about being nice, but if you are overly nice you can really put people off. So remember, that it’s always better to be perceived as an average person with your own sets of relatable human faults than having an impeccable, shining visage. Mix up your behavior a bit. As a rule of thumb: For every four good deeds, reach out and just smack somebody in the mouth.

2. It’s not what you said, It’s about what you didn’t

If you´re still asking yourself “Why do people hate me?” it could be because you prefer to avoid social interactions instead of getting into the risk of being perceived as awkward or having to deal with certain types of people, where you don’t know exactly how they will behave towards you. So saying nothing and avoiding the interactions seems to be the safer deal.

Example #1: Imagine you are in a shopping mall and you run into a co-student or co-worker of yours. You might think that it is better to pretend you don’t see the person and just walk by without saying anything.

Example #2: There is this very popular co-worker of yours and he has birthday. Everyone comes up to him and wishes him a happy birthday and makes a little small talk. At the same time you just stay at the side of the group and prefer to say nothing as he had already so many persons wishing him a happy birthday. So you really wouldn’t make any difference and he wouldn’t remember it either.

Example #3: There is a party coming up and you get an invitation. You prefer to not have to deal with an explanation why you can’t come and just say nothing. You also don’t show up at the party.

Well, you think you are on the safe side as you just didn’t have to interact and nobody got hurt. Let me tell you that it is not that easy. People mostly notice when we don’t want to interact with them. So your co-student or co-worker will automatically have the image of you that you try to avoid him AND conclude that you probably do not like him. If they think that you don’t like them, then they will also start to dislike you. Try to build up your self-esteem over time to feel more confident in interactions with people. Here is an article that can help you to build confidence.

man showing middle finger

Keep in mind that for lots of people not saying a word is the bitterest insult possible. Yes, it’s even worse than insulting them directly.

To help you understand what I mean, think of it this way: You apply for a job. What is worse for you? A rejection letter OR no reply at all? Well, a rejection letter is pretty bad of course, but no reply at all is dismissive and disrespectful. It is a lot worse and many people will think that the human resource manager is an asshole of not taking the time to respond. This is how many people take your avoidance to speak to them.

If you want to learn how to become popular and have more friends than you can manage you should download this Guide: Ian’s Get Popular Guide

I hope this point could give you an answer to the question “Why do people hate me?” Remember that hate is not the opposite of love, but apathy is. For a lot of people you would be better off telling them to fuck off, because at least you are admitting that they matter.

3. Love yourself first

Have you ever heard the expression “Love your neighbor as yourself”? I think it is a nice bible verse BUT totally misunderstood by so many people. Most people focus on the “love your neighbor” but completely forget about the “yourself”. I am entirely convinced that loving yourself first is inevitable in order to be able to love others too.

Why do people hate me? They do so, because you hate yourself! Let’s take this on a more practical level. If you are unhappy about yourself and don’t like certain characteristics of yours, you will probably have a hard time accepting yourself as you are. This discontentment will lead to two things:

– You will dislike or have a hard time accepting people that are much better off than you, and

– Other people will perceive your negative feelings towards yourself on an unconscious level and also have a harder time in accepting you.

Here is my practical advice what you can do in this case: Learn to love yourself! Stop searching for things that you don’t like about yourself.  Nobody is perfect on this planet! Absolutely no one! Instead start to focus on the things that you like about yourself. Now please, don’t tell me that there is nothing that you love about yourself! Everyone has something! And so do you!

Love yourself

So search for the things that you are talented in, that you like about your exterior and your interior, write them down (at least 10 things) and just be happy about it. Always remember that you have the equal right to be loved on this planet as everybody else has! Learn how to be the person everybody wants to hang out with! Click here to learn more!

76 Responses to Why Do People Hate Me? 3 Reasons and what YOU can do about it!

  1. HNayak July 20, 2013 at 6:16 pm #

    I loved this article. A good article and in my case, I think I will go with the first reason. i.e I am too nice towards others and keep agreeing to others opinions rather than placing my opinions to challenge theirs. I will try to change myself.

    • zack September 26, 2013 at 5:43 pm #

      i just dont want others to judge me so i dont do anything that they can judge me on

      • Anonymous November 4, 2013 at 10:33 pm #

        Yah exactly

      • Anonymous November 29, 2013 at 8:31 pm #

        SAME! People don’t really know who i am so i act as a different person and keep the real me inside. I wished people want judge me. I wish i could be whoever i want to be

      • Anonymous December 29, 2013 at 1:18 am #

        Hi i have anxiety 2 not many ppl like me coz of it

    • J October 15, 2013 at 9:10 pm #

      I like nice people. My opinion is that you don’t have to change yourself. Its other stupid people problem, if they don’t like you. There are many nice people with good hearts in this world. You just have to find them. Good Luck Dear HNayak!

    • Cindz October 23, 2013 at 11:04 am #

      i’m a bit too nice to that i feel like the people in my class only like me because i’m smart and nice enough to tutor them. but it would make me seem snobbish to suddenly say no to them. i have a lot of friends inside and outside the classroom but my seat mates are really annoying. they keep bothering me with questions during a SW and even a QUIZ! i tell them, “PLEASE LET ME FINISH FIRST!” and then they look at me like I was the one that did something wrong! you have your own brain and time, don’t make me feel like you’re just using me like a 10 hours/5 school days book that you open only when you need to. i tell my own opinions but people take advantage of me! i’m a bit FC too (feeling-close) until they started avoiding me. i WAS wrong by doing that but I feel so lonely inside the class now. i can’t survive not having even a few friends to talk to inside the classroom. i’ve already experienced it before.
      thanks for the article, i’ll try to be average and learn to deny people normally.

      • Anonymous October 27, 2013 at 7:12 pm #

        I feel that way now

    • Anonymous February 4, 2014 at 11:39 pm #

      Yeah!!!!! omg, i honestly feel like people hate me, cuz whenever i say something that i personally think is hilarious, they kinda just look at me and ignore me… All they expect from me is the answers to the test… it’s kinda hard to show who you really are when they’re not going to accept you for it.

  2. jet20 August 3, 2013 at 7:23 am #

    I like the analysis of this article, but think the conclusion falls short of a solution (not for the sake of being controversial ;). A hated person focusing on loving himself is mostly focusing on secondary narcissicism, which rarely works out to improve interaction with others. You just spend even less time to get noticed by others. I tried it before, doesn’t work.

    Also, I want to point out a different version of problem 2 (insulting other people by ignoring them): my problem is the exact opposite, people ignore me all the time, often quite willfully (so I feel insulted regularly) despite my best efforts to connect to them! How can it be that it’s always me trying to make the first step, writing the first message etc. and when I don’t, suddenly everyone is gone? Or put in another way, how is it that so many people seem to have a problem with me (imperfect as I am – certainly not always Mr. Nice Guy) when I don’t have a problem with them and can look past their own failings?

    • gul August 25, 2013 at 10:28 pm #

      people does the same with me on “people ignoring me”

      i guess we both need to be more open and talk to people, like in our class or outside when we see them (in a supermarket “hi” “hi” “bye “bye”) even a mini convo would make a difference, but you know the main problem, when people are with friends they change.

    • Anonymous January 6, 2014 at 9:23 am #

      I’m with you. Im just short of words. This problem I have is now decades old. Very entwined. Just when I think I’m over it . It comes back to me tenfold.

      • Anonymous March 11, 2014 at 7:57 pm #

        I don’t know what to do everybody in school hate me I have just one friend and I just don’t now what to do.

  3. John Leeman August 23, 2013 at 12:32 am #

    i love this so much muumuu!

  4. Anonymous August 25, 2013 at 9:36 am #

    Some of the above is,right but is the person aura ,persona which either perceived positive or negative by others and what we do about It Can only make marginal difference on people mind ,so I do Catherine Tate .

  5. gul August 25, 2013 at 10:24 pm #

    omg this is all true, Im so dump not realising.

    thanks alot from now on Im gunna just talk talk talk, not be too nice too people, and certainly not avoiding anyone in a supermarket or in town. this really help me understand why i havent made any friends in college this year.
    mainly because I was way too nice to people and calm, I wasn’t that talkatie at all. mainly becuase in shy which is why i avoid saying “hi” to people when i see then outside college.

    • gul August 25, 2013 at 10:24 pm #


      • Anonymous October 15, 2013 at 1:32 am #

        Everybody hates me and gave up on me. They try to lie and say that they do when they really don’t. I don’t know y they hate me, but they always stay quite when I tell a joke. They never laugh. Nobody will ever love me cause I’m a failure to God’s name. I should just die

        • Me October 18, 2013 at 9:52 am #

          You are not a failure. You are a child of the Universe have a right to be here, and you deserve love and happiness.

        • Forgiven October 23, 2013 at 7:17 am #

          We all deserve to die because we are all sinners. But Jesus loves us so much he died in our place and paid the cost in full. You are redeemed. All he wants is for us to have faith and trust in him. He wants us to love and forgive each other and ourselves as he forgave us. Don’t worry about how others are treating you, just love them. Know they have their own problems and don’t even know how their actions or lack of actions are making you feel. You know how it feels, so try your best at loving them by laughing at their jokes and believing what they tell you and wondering what is happening in their lives and how they feel. Remember Jesus loves you.

        • Anonymous September 28, 2014 at 3:01 am #

          Awww don’t say that. I too am hated on by everyone at work. I just keep happy and can’t wait to hug my puppy dog when I get home.

        • nane July 18, 2015 at 1:13 pm #

          me too

  6. merit coba August 27, 2013 at 3:08 pm #

    At first sight a nice article even though it is short. But as jet20 already pointed out: there are other reasons as well. In fact there are many reasons why people simply do not like you
    and there are even people who dislike you because they want to dislike someone and you are as good a target as anyone else..
    One day I asked a guy at work why he disliked me and he told me why. He had worked his way up from the workfloor and I was from the university. And everyone he had met from the university was an asshole. And therefore I was one too because I was from the university. Simply put: I was not his kind of person and that was it. You can admire him, because he was honest with me, but many are like that and don’t tell you.

    I am lonely at times and sometimes it gets to me, but you know what? Almost everyone is. Look around and you will find few people having the extended group of people with deep friendships that books and movies tell us exist because it is convenient for the story.
    Oh, some people will pretend to have them or simply name people they know friends. You got people who have drinking buddies or fishing buddies or co-workers. Or they go partying with a group of people.
    You can do to, if you want to and do not mind changing your lifestyle. That is the thing you see, if you don’t want to be alone you have to cater to the needs of others and you will suffer for it, like jet20.
    If I look around I see few people who have large groups of friends or even a few intimate friends. It is more rare than common. Perhaps I live in the sad part of society, but I got a suspicious idea that it is not true.
    Perhaps this is the price we pay for liberty and individualism. IF you were part of a tribe you had no choice, but you wouldn’t be alone.

    • C September 30, 2013 at 8:24 am #

      I agree with this wholeheartedly. We’re taught how things SHOULD be in media and so on, but if we ever open our eyes, we’d realise that on the whole, everyone has issues, everyone hates to be lonely, and most people will deny everything that seems painful or will make them “look bad.”

      I think everyone needs hugs and compassion, mostly from themselves.

    • J October 15, 2013 at 9:15 pm #

      You have to find yourself a hobby. For example, I love music, so I m making it and have online friends to talk about music. Check out my page, if you like https://soundcloud.com/julia-savina-1

  7. Mia September 27, 2013 at 3:24 pm #

    Thanks so much for this advice, it really helps. I think I have a lot of these annoying characteristics that I did not even consider to be acting negatively on others.

  8. Andy October 2, 2013 at 4:05 am #

    Nothing stood out. I’m not overly nice or mean I barely talk I’m really shy and sensitive. Some girls say I’m nice and attractive but only if I’ve known then forever but most people say I’m mean and ugly for no reason when I never even talk much. Let alone say anything mean… like tons of random people text me and tell me I’m ugly and nobody likes me and I should go die… I’ve tried to commit suicide but I just passed out and got sick from the meds and ever since I can’t stop knowing I’m awful… idle what to do

    • BDK December 6, 2013 at 3:21 pm #

      Hi Andy,

      No matter what don’t give up! I have always been hated and am still disliked and have no real friends outside of my wife and children. Hang in there and find that one person who resonates with you. I guarantee she is out there but you have to keep looking. Read the book “Please Understand Me” to find out what your personality style is. Mine is 1% of the population. When I found this out it helped me to accept myself alot more and the book helped me understand myself and others a little bit more. I feel anxiety all the time but I vowed to not let it stop me from doing what I needed to do to survive in our culture. Force yourself to get out there and act confident to the best of your ability but do it, even if your voice quakes and your hand shakes. Doing something is better than doing nothing at all.

  9. Anonymous October 2, 2013 at 6:43 pm #

    You all have huge problems and if male the worst thing about it is that you have made your own lives bad thinking that makes you and everyone happy if a women until the male becomes less violent and with vicious he wont ever succeed in relationships with women as the opposites attract only end in disasters.

  10. Swordtaker2 October 2, 2013 at 7:11 pm #

    :For me I don’t agree with most of this but that’s just me and I will just try to talk more for people could think I’m interesting and annoying but add a few jokes that they might already know but idk like I Xerox that’s just me act like your self u dont listen to non of this

  11. Soghra October 3, 2013 at 10:17 am #

    This is so me and @merit coba spoke my mind. I have social anxiety, low self esteem, zero confidence you name it i have it. At work I do my best to hide it unsuccessfully. I don’t converse with ,y colleagues at work (I’m an enrolled nurse), i have always felt like I cannot carry intelligent conversations and so people get bored of me and eventually hate me. People ignore me all the time. I’m also too nice and always agree with people, hoping that they would like me, but of course it always ends up the total opposite. English is not my first language and I have been here (Perth) about eight years now, i was born an raised in Afghanistan. So the language becomes barrier at times. I also have not made any friends ever since i have been here. yes I do feel alone at times and it gets to me but like @merit coba said ultimately we are all alone. I feel better knowing that I am not alone in this, and there are so many people out there just like myself. I;m not gonna lose in myself, an please whoever is out there please don’t lose hope and carry on. There is someone who loves you.

  12. bell1164 October 12, 2013 at 2:20 am #

    i just feel like one day the world will end becuse of me i just feel like no one loves me im not a lovable person and people love other people but its diffrent for me im just so diffrent ill never be loved only by my family (of course) but i have an awful life i try to not commit suscide……….

  13. Laura October 13, 2013 at 10:34 am #

    Pretty good article, I would likely fall into category 2, but I think an important addition is that more likely than not you are not hated, that’s just something we come up with in our own heads.

    • shez November 19, 2013 at 5:59 am #

      feel like that!

  14. Kwonjong Kim October 23, 2013 at 9:06 pm #

    This article is absolutely for me. It describes me so well.
    I’ve been studying in America for 7 years, and I have no friends.
    I always try to avoid every awkward situation and I tend to think it’s better to not say anything than making someone feel awkward.
    When I see my classmates or people I’ve met before outside, I pretend that I did not see them, and I hope they don’t see me.
    I am also very nice. I hate and afraid of saying something against other people’s opinions or thoughts. I’d rather agree or not say anything at all. I guess having this kind of conversation bores the other person I am talking to, and they easily lose interests in me. A conversation never lasts long.
    I’ve been this way my entire life, and I do not know if I can change, and I might just be the way I have been…

    • Corporate Lonely Girl November 30, 2013 at 4:44 am #

      I feel the same way at work. In my own circle of friends or when I am out on the town, I feel well-adjusted and social. When I am at work I feel like an introvert and I know no one likes me. I feel like I don’t fit in and I am beneath everyone. People treat me like I am invisible so I try to avoid social situations, or after work happy hours, and the christmas parties. When people do speak to me, I try to be overly nice and agree with most things said…. just so people will like me. After reading this article I see that probably pushes people away. I feel like its too late to build a bond with anyone at work. Everyone just thinks I am shy, doesn’t invite me anywhere and I just feel awkward in my own skin 24/7. The very few times when people invite me places, I feel like after I speak there is always an awkward silence. If I ever tell a joke no one laughs. I just want to find another job and start over :(

  15. anoymous November 1, 2013 at 11:19 pm #

    Its not as easy as u think! Theres this girl whos been dragging MY best friend away and when i ask my best to come wiv me this other girl tell me if i dont wanna go wiv her then go away and i dont have anyone else to go to!
    Someone help cos i start to cry myself to sleep everynight cos i feel no one wants to be wiv me no more!

  16. Very Seriously Speaking November 4, 2013 at 12:12 am #

    Well there are many women out there that really do Stink to have a relationship with, and it is very sad that there are just too many Psycho women that like to Curse at us men who are looking to start a Normal Conversation with them. There are just too many women that hate us men to begin with which is the reason why many of us men are Single Today.

  17. Artu November 7, 2013 at 9:00 pm #

    I hope that none of you will even try to commit suicide, You must never had someone do

    that to you. Unless you hate the people who love you (I wish I could meet all of you),

    don’t even think of suicide. You will kill a part of these people.

    • Anonymous March 15, 2014 at 4:39 pm #

      The whole point is, what if you have absolutely nobody in the whole world that even cares.

    • nobody March 15, 2014 at 4:43 pm #

      The whole point is, what if there is absolutely nobody in the world that even cares.

  18. Veronica November 8, 2013 at 5:31 am #

    Literally I’m hated for no reason. A girl made up a rumor against me with the popular girls and now since they don’t like me no one else does. The fact that I didn’t do anything wrong it’s all rumors

    • Kristen November 16, 2013 at 5:14 pm #

      Veronica, The same thing happened to me in my husband’s family. My sister-in-law spread rumors about me and now no one will even look at me. Try not to worry about it, it’s their loss! Just be successful and be you! The right people will come along.

    • shez November 19, 2013 at 5:51 am #

      hey dont worry u have done nothing wrong thats the main thing!

      • Daisy January 12, 2014 at 3:12 am #


    • shez November 19, 2013 at 5:56 am #

      the blame is on her not on u

    • shez November 19, 2013 at 5:58 am #

      feel sorry for u

  19. Colin November 10, 2013 at 3:49 pm #

    As for me, my colleagues hate me for opportunities awarded to me by managers. I tried making friends outside of work but people generally don’t respond positively to me. I tried drinking and clubbing but alcohol makes me sick, leaves me with intolerably headache for days. I also hate the fact that there’s always pressure from drink buddies to pick up women at the club. I’m 35 years old and still single, most guys of my age are married and when I try to make friends with them, they never have time for me as they are married. I feel so cursed and unloved. Even when I find a girlfriend, my loneliness makes me clingy and need and as a result, I’m always left alone.

    • socialorsucessful..... December 18, 2014 at 3:49 am #

      buy a supermoto ( its basically a dirtbike thats street legal) , and look on youtube for guys in your area to ride with.

  20. shez November 19, 2013 at 5:48 am #

    i tried everyway possible to change myself still no one seems to be friendly or talk to me even though i try my best in every way, i am so fed up and now trying to accept the way i am.

  21. nostal November 26, 2013 at 5:57 pm #

    bahahaha Its even worse than directly insulting them LOLLL I thought it was only rude but not to the point of that omg but really I have no idea how to approach them? It’s just weird..they sometimes don’t response or response like it’s some awkward thing instead of normal greeting so why should I bother?:(

  22. mahalie December 1, 2013 at 1:51 pm #

    It often happens when some thing valuable is being started to sparkle from u.If u don’t handle the mess ,the spakle light perishes.

  23. Vinay Rao December 14, 2013 at 3:26 pm #

    I love this article …
    This is about me …
    From this movement I’m gonna change my self.

    This article helps me a lot …
    Thanks a lot …

  24. Jess December 15, 2013 at 2:39 pm #

    Yeah I think I can relate to all three suggestions. I am so nice to people and they treat the rude people with more respect. There are times when I get straight up ignored by the same people that I went out of my way for.

    I read about a study where the people who were rude and then later became nice to a person were more liked than people who were too nice from the beginning.

    Once a guy was talking to me about someone else that we both know and he referred to the person as being overly friend and “fake” nice. I find the guy very charming and friendly and he is one of the few people that is always nice to me. But I guess people do not trust too nice.

  25. Jesse December 24, 2013 at 4:17 am #

    People are too worried about what they think other people think of them. Stop worrying about it, be yourself, and say screw other people. I have no Friends now, but hey, I’m happy.

  26. kristin December 29, 2013 at 1:31 am #

    Hi all I’m new 2 this I’m kristin i have bad anxiety have no friends ppl in this fuckup world don’t get mee all i whant is 2 be happy and belone :(

  27. The Exact Psycho as described above January 5, 2014 at 3:37 pm #

    Brilliant! That is absolutely me!

    A very recent example would be a small treat I gave to some people in my project. I decided to ignore the rest as I was afraid to go up to them and ask them to join in. I observed that from the next day they even stopped saying hi to me.

    Further, a chick who works with me has started ignoring me completely. I believe this is primarily because I have always only kept looking (read staring) at her and never mustered the courage to say a hi.

    The article has actually served as an eye-opener for me. Thanks a lot! :-)

  28. matt January 16, 2014 at 9:59 pm #

    I really like this read up but what I can never get is the fact that no one is ever curious enough to ask if im alright

  29. Lalala January 17, 2014 at 4:07 pm #

    I feel this way right now

  30. Lala January 17, 2014 at 4:15 pm #

    I get the feeling that everyone hates me and I don’t know why. This article says that it’s because I’m ( anyone who is reading this ) is too nice. But I don’t understand. Why don’t people like nice people? Are you saying that people want others to be mean to them? Nice people are nice because they want to be treated nicely too. God told us to love one another, show kindness to one another, forgive one another for the wrongdoings that anyone has done and many more that is good. So.. What’s wrong with being nice? I feel that my haters are jealous of our niceness. I’m not trying to be proud as God told us to be humble. But I think this way because they aren’t nice. I’m just commenting about the first point.

  31. Angela January 18, 2014 at 8:19 pm #

    It’s not you, it’s them. People are so into themselves they don’t even consider that you are not, for example, invited to the party. They are just happy THEY were invited. They don’t think about the somewhat quiet person who is not invited, that perhaps it might be nice to be included. This is me at work. And I wouldn’t even say I’m quiet, really. I state my opinions for the most part, in a nice way. I’m not overly nice. I’m gracious. I’m funny. I’m fun at parties, talking and smiling with everyone, saying “yay, Suzie’s here!” But I am sure to not be overly hyper, just happy to see people. I just don’t get it and never will. I feel like an outcast at work most of the time. Maybe number 3 applies to me? I am too hard on myself. I can also be negative at times. But I know one woman at work who is constantly complaining and she’s miss popular, so go figure. I’ll never understand this social thing. Never.

    • Marsha March 3, 2014 at 1:02 am #

      Angela, I am alot like you. We are well balanced, fun, nice people yet feeling lonely or ignored. I think there alot of negative people out there and if you are not one of them complaining and running others down we dont fit in. I have great friends outside of work, but the people I work with now, are rude to me or dont invite me places. It’s a new experience for me not to be liked, but I am trying to focus on myself and my own fun and be open to meeting a good friend among my work colleagues. It’s lonely, but I think we just need to find that one person or few people we connect with and dont think about the others. Interestingly, I really click with all the married women, but the single women hate me. I think as one reply stated, if you dont want to tolerate the bad behavior of others and fit in you will end up alone alot. But stop internalizing it and thinking it’s you, people. Work on being your best always, being real, and being fun and you will eventually make some friends.Stop worrying about what others think! You’ll be fine! Hang in there and stop talking suicide. Life is a LONG journey with so many changes, giving up is just plain stupid and short sighted. Be happy and be yourself!!

  32. Anonymous January 25, 2014 at 7:41 am #

    I think humans have hierarchies/pecking orders much like other species for many reasons, some tangible, some intangible. In my experience/perception, people are fickle and dynamic. Again, the reasons are often elusive or too complex.

  33. Carlos January 26, 2014 at 4:40 pm #

    That’s exactly what I’ve been doing: building self confidence to not to avoid social interactions.
    We most of the times dont say so, but it’s true: We avoid some situations mostly not because “we dont want” but exactly because we dont feel confident enough to not avoid it anymore and we tend to give lame excuses for that. Like a friend of mine had a total and horriblest excuse ever: I want a very white girlfriend, blond, green eyes and with the name of Angelica. That was his excuse for not going out there and getting the girl he wanted, to give an excuse of why he didnt have a girlfriend… but it tends to be some kind of unconscious excuse.

  34. Anonymous February 4, 2014 at 11:42 pm #

    the article was great, and i’ll definitely follow the advice… I’ll say something that i personally think is hilarious and nobody laughs and they kinda ignore me, and it’s because all they expect from me is to give them answers to the test!!! I hate having stereotypes set, and you have to abide by them. i can’t really be who i want to be for the fear people will ignore me

  35. annie the anonymous February 4, 2014 at 11:47 pm #

    Yeah!!!!! honestly though, i kind of feel ignored, because despite who i really am, people judge me nevertheless. i personally think i’m just a teensy bit funny, but whenever i crack a joke, everybody just ignores me… the only reason anybody ever talks to me is when they’re required to or when they want answers to the test… it’s hard to be who you want to be when all these stereotypes are set.

  36. Jake April 1, 2014 at 7:16 pm #

    Strangely, I’ve done all of the “right things” stated by this article and yet I still feel pretty hated by others. I’m nice, sometimes funny (at least I think), confident about 90% of the things I do, all A,B student, but no matter what I do, everyone seems to resent me. When I leave a room or enter it, the atmosphere seems to change. One example of which is when I used to ride to school with my neighbor and her boyfriend. Ever since we were about elementary age we had been quite close friends. But as a sophomore I can’t necessarily drive yet. Her and her boyfriend are juniors and offered to take me to school. I’ve been no different to her or him then anyone who “seems” to like me, and her boyfriend (as I’m told) is a really nice guy to everyone, except he hates me for some reason. I don’t know what I do to people like him, but most people just utterly hate me. Im not entirely sure why. I’m not ugly, nor horribly gorgeous. I’d rate myself average in looks compared to others. It’s just simply that most people in my class hate me for no apparent reason. Why?

  37. Rodrigo August 25, 2014 at 11:13 pm #

    OMG This article was so helpful! Really, really thank you, kind person who wrote it! I have discovered recently that I suffer with social anxiety, and understanding more about what I’m passing through, what I’m feeling and what exactly is on other people’s minds is amazing! Thank you again!

  38. Todd September 30, 2014 at 9:54 pm #

    The article resonated with me a bit, but not entirely. Unfortunately, I’m one of those people that everyone unconditionally hates on sight. No matter how I look, dress, or act, people look at me with disgust in their eyes. I’m 26 and never been close to anyone in anyway. And you know what? After a while. You get used to it. Everyone hates me. Sure. That’s their problem. That means I’ll just live in spite of everyone else.

  39. Iris October 24, 2014 at 1:23 am #

    I personally didnt like this analyzation. Like.. wtf?! So im the one with the problem cause bitches give me dirty looks when I smile at them?!? Uh…. no. Fuck them!! I was curious about what actually goes on in these stupid bitches’ brain’s but I think they should be fkn adults and be mature enough to not roll their stupid eyes. And if they feel the need to be spoken to then how hard is it for THEM to initiate a conversation?? Im not gonna kiss anyones ass to get them to like. I just wish ppl could control their stupid rude faces.
    And jobs… theres millions upon millions of workplaces that dont call back. Get over it and look for another one. I had a situation where I had an interview and recieved a letter that they hired someone else but…. these fkn assholes spelled my name incorrectly 3 fkn times on that letter. I guess they had enough time to get the address right but not my name…

  40. socialorsucessful..... December 18, 2014 at 4:35 am #

    hello everyone, i think i can help. and this is going to blow your mind. it did mine anyway. in three words ” thoughts become things “. and i mean that very literally, not in the way that its just in your head. your subconscious mind is kicking your ass. its your paradigms that need to change and your subconscious mind that need to change. this might not be that easy to do, but at least its something you can do. ever heard of ” the secret”? its a video about how your thoughts make your reality. and i mean that very literally. when you become aware, you will change your life. this has to do with quantum physics and the very fabric of our reality. reality, is actually much different than most of us perceive it to be, thats because for 1 we were unaware, and 2 our parents imposed their paradigms on us from the start and over time we created a subconscious mind that thinks things are a certain way because thats the way it has been trained to think, do to being unaware that our thoughts manifest in front of us. i could be here a long time talking about this. but you’re going to have to see for yourself in order to really see how powerful this is, and there are tons of videos on this subject. the tech term is ” the law of attraction “. everything that is in your life has been attracted to you by your thoughts. the universe gives you want you think about, in one way or another. our emotions give our thoughts energy. instead of changing how you feel and resisting the so called negative feelings, do not resist the feeling, just simply change your thoughts and you will change your life, quit literally. think I’m full of it. become aware of what you’re thinking about, and then become aware that its manifesting right in front of you. ( do you see green cars all the time? or a certain number, or set of numbers ) do you say to yourself, ” i see green cars all the time “, or ” i see that number all the time “, well thats why you see those things all the time. some things manifest quickly and some things take longer, like a couple days or the next day you might see it. do yourself a favor and learn all you can about the law of attraction. its truly amazing! oh.. by the way…heres something to think about as well, scientist have learned that everything is nothing more than energy. they have looked at the very fabric of our so called physical reality, ( everything you see, touch, feel, taste, smell ), and everything at its core is nothing more than energy…..suck on that for a second! you have to beleive though, i mean really believe, because if you think that it won’t work, then guess what, it won’t, or at least that will be the way it seems. think happy thoughts like peter pan, and you can fly!! be careful what you wish for, your thoughts are your wishes, and the universe has no choice but to give it to you. :)

  41. Nathaniel December 28, 2014 at 1:11 pm #

    OMG I read this article and my emotions it’s so heart break I wanted to cry cause I admit myself I have social anxiety in 18 yrs old from now on , but myself today

    I feel relief and relax right now..
    And thank you for this article its really help myself ..

  42. guelda josil July 18, 2015 at 1:25 pm #

    There are a lot of things that happen to me in this world. I am so nice, shy, and i have depression. people always wanna take advantage of me because of these, bully me, lie on me, discourage me. The way they look at me at school and at work make me feel bad, that i am not human, i am just a toy. Everything i do turns against me, Sometimes i say i wanna smoke weed to feel better, but i have never done that. God don’t love me, he wants me to suffer, all i want is to die. I tried to kill myself so many times, but i am still alive. help me please

  43. Michael July 27, 2015 at 4:29 am #


  44. Michael July 27, 2015 at 4:31 am #

    Sorry I was just making sure it actually worked, lol. A lot of the time it doesn’t. I feel very unfortunate with people. A lot of people look at me as if I’m a disease it feels like. I don’t mean to sound dramatic but that’s the look on most people’s, especially girls and women’s faces, when they see me. Half of my Facebook friends have unfriended me for no reason. A lot of people can somehow single me out and make fun of me or judge me the worst and it really, really hurts my feelings. I’ve contemplated suicide before but obviously never gone through with it, only in my worst days. I would never do that now. I still hurt inside. I don’t like talking to people now because I’ve been pushed away so much.

  45. Michael July 27, 2015 at 4:39 am #

    I’ve been dealing with rejection for years and years. I honestly don’t have any friends right now. I feel like I have a personality type that drives people away. I’m very nice but I’m shy. Every friend I’ve had has ended up mad at me and I have absolutely no idea why. I don’t ignore or push people away. I just feel like I”m repulsive in most people’s eyes. Please no mean comments. I don’t need that right now. Seriously.

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